The societal ideals of a “perfect body” is a patriarchal construct made to control and suppress women. If you’re reading this you’ve fallen prey to the unrealistic ideals of having to fit a mold. The mold of the size of 32" 24" 35".
How do you fight the patriarchy telling you what your body can or can’t be? The only way is to love yourself fully and unconditionally. Fight with love and acceptance.
We’re not saying this will happen overnight. It’s a long, rocky road but you are NOT alone. Society has always told us to be less than we are. To take less space, be thinner and shorter than your boyfriend because that is cute.
If someone hasn’t told you this already, we are:
Never Apologize For The Space You Take In This World.
Being body positive is being confident in your body. It’s ok if you want to change the body that you came in, as Hailey Steinfeld said. Because really it doesn’t matter how you look but how you feel. And if you want to change from inside and outside, start your journey of self-care and self-love today.
These are some steps that can get you started:
1. Cut the negative, toxic people out of your life
Did you always think you were too fat or too ugly? No! We were born perfect and we were aware of it. How did it change then? It was our parents, family members, or friends telling us differently. Slowly we internalized their words and their beliefs. So that we now have an internalized dialogue fueled with self-hatred.
This must stop. Leave body-shaming people in the past. Relationships of any kind are for support and love. If they’re not adding to your peace and love but taking from it, then that relationship doesn’t serve you anymore.
2. Practicing self-care
Self-care is self-love put into action. So many days we go neglecting our bodies, treating it like it doesn’t exist. Maybe because it’s easier to not think than feel the hatred of our words. But you do have a body. And once you live in it, in the present moment, as it is, instead of criticizing it or dreaming how it could be in the future. Then you start to care about the body that has done so much for you.
Meditate. Change your relationship with food. Do something that makes you happy to remind yourself you are more than how you look. Every small step and progress matters!
Be Kind To Yourself.
3. Practicing loving self-talk
The problem isn’t our bodies, it’s our minds. You can unlearn the hate you learned as a child. Every day you look in the mirror and say hateful things and go into a spiral.
Start by interrupting that thought pattern with something positive. Look in the mirror and say you love yourself this time. This is how you remain body-positive. By replacing self-hate with love.
In the beginning, it may be hard to fight with that voice in your head. But slowly, over time you won’t have to remind yourself of your worth. You’ll know truly and deeply how beautiful you are and all the good things in life you deserve.
How you speak to yourself matters!
4. Accept compliments
You are beautiful. You are gorgeous. You are strong. Accept it! When people give you compliments, many times we say, “thank you, but…”
We find it difficult to accept their compliments because we think it’s not true. Oftentimes we forget to see the beauty in us that other people notice. It’s not just your shape that makes you beautiful, it’s how you treat others and so many other intangible things that we forget about. Others notice it.
Ask yourself do you think your best friend is beautiful because of her body or because of what an amazing person she is? You treat everyone so nicely, with such compassion. Remember to extend that courtesy to yourself.
Compliment others more freely. On days you find it difficult to see the beauty in yourself, ground yourself by seeing the beauty in others.
You don’t need to be accepted by others,
You need to accept yourself- Thich Nhat Hanh
5. Surround yourself with positivity
Consume more positive media. Songs that make you feel better. Movies and TV-shows with good representation. Read body-positive quotes. Be a positive force yourself, don’t body-shame other women or men.
Soon enough you’ll be the badass you don’t realize you already are.
No amount of self-improvement can make up for any lack of self-acceptance- Robert Holden.
Who said you need to be a size zero to dress how you want. Glitzy Girlz Boutique brings out all the confidence in you through fashion. At Glitzy Glam Plus Size Boutique, we believe the confident-you is the best-you. So we sell products that uplift women.
Stay strong and remember you’re beautiful! Plus Size Boutique
That’s our blog! We hope it helped you. Please feel free to share your story with us in the comments.